Soul Mate Gibberish

Before we get into this, let’s just take a second to clarify the term soul mate so as to ensure that we’re all on the same page.

As I see it, there are two main ways we can use this term:

• Option 1: Someone (a mate) you’ve grown to know and love on the soul level – which includes the mind, will, and emotions.


• Option 2:  Someone (a mate) you feel was created specifically for you and vice versa.

If you’re someone who believes in option one, we’re totally tracking. After being in a relationship with someone for a while, it is not only possible but inevitable that your souls will become intertwined. In most cases that’s good. It’s something we should all hope for in friends and family, not just a spouse – though a spouse will likely know you more intimately than anyone else.

If you’re someone who believes in option two, I was right there with you for quite some time. But let me share with you a few things I’ve discovered since.

God is sovereign

The truth is, yes God does prepare someone for you, but it’s not like as He was forming you, He took a chunk of your soul and placed it in some guy and did the same for the guy so that neither of you would feel complete until you found your missing half. Free will knows no exception when it comes to the choices we make, including the realm of relationships, so it’s important for us to realize that God doesn’t make the choice for us. I mean think about it. Why would God give us the freedom to make every other decision in life but whom we should marry?

Instead, what’s really happening is that God – who knows what we’re thinking even before we think it – is working behind the scenes to work our decisions for our good. He sees what’s in our hearts, the kind of person we’ll be as Jesus continues the good work he started in us, and He knows who we will eventually choose as a spouse. In His sovereign wisdom He merely begins preparing you and your spouse for what only He knows will come.

Every step you take

When I married my husband I could have easily claimed that he was my soul mate. During our engagement phase, when we shared the visions God had given each of us for our individual lives, it was like his vision was filling in certain gaps in my vision and my vision was expanding the territory of his vision. It was literally a perfect overlap.

It’s easy for us as humans to just assume that relationships like this must mean that God ordained us to be together from the beginning of time, but that really is only demonstrating a limited understanding of who God is. Our God is so sovereign, so wise, so powerful, that He can take whatever choice we make and turn it into something that reaches far beyond our expectations. He's not limited by our decisions. 

To tell you the truth, when I first met my husband he wasn’t very serious about his relationship with God and I couldn’t have ever seen myself in a relationship with him. In fact, I avoided him for a number of years for that very reason. Years later, by the time God got finished working in both of us, we couldn’t see anything but how good we were for each other. That was no one but God.

With every step we take, He’s not only watching us, but He’s working all things together for our good.

 

The true lover of our souls

Some Sadducees once brought up a good point when they approached the good teacher to ask a very important question:

“If a woman marries and the husband dies and she marries each of the six brothers, which man’s wife will she be in heaven?”

Jesus of course had the easiest answer to ease their concerns, “None. She will be mine.”

Doesn’t that give you chills?

If there is any person in heaven or on earth that we can claim is our soul mate, it’s Jesus. Life on this earth is only preparation for the ultimate wedding day we’ll have with the King of all kings, the fairest of ten thousand. To give his title of soul mate to any one man honestly cheapens the reality that we are to be living in each day as a bride betrothed to another.

Now I’m speaking to you as someone who is married, so I can give a bit of perspective from the other side. No matter how deeply you love someone or how perfectly you feel they match your personality, likes and dislikes, or even your spirituality, they can never compare to the lover of your soul.

Throughout our lives God will connect us with numerous people that we will develop strong soul ties to, and for some of you that number may include a husband. God designed us this way, and it’s truly beautiful. As we choose to yield to the direction of the Holy Spirit He will do the work He does best: refining us and transforming us into a pure and spotless bride, so that one day we will finally meet our true soul mate, the one created for us from the beginning of time, and what an incredible day that will be.

Once again, if you're reading this post, I'd love to hear from you. What's your perspective on soul mates? Do you agree or disagree?

Until next time!

S'ambrosia is a published author and singer-songwriter with a heart to see God's people experience deep levels of intimacy with Him. She currently lives in Kenya with her husband where they are beginning a ministry called The Joshua Blueprint, which aims to come alongside existing children's homes to teach children various expressions of worship. 

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Seeking God In Singleness

For 2015, my one “word” is seeking.

There have been so many times lately when my life has felt at a crossroads and it has been in those times when I needed to hear what God would say.  But it hasn’t always been this way.

When I was in the 7^th grade, I started reading romance novels getting so absorbed in the stories. I could live through the eyes of the female protagonists and fall in love over and over again. But the sad part would be when the character got her happily ever after and all I got was a finished book. I kept wondering when it was going to be my turn. When that turn seemed to take longer and longer, I decided to take my love life into my own hands and do something about my lack of romance.

About a year after I became a Christian, I met a guy. One thing led to another and before I knew it, I was head over heels in love for the first time. I wanted to be the one who would fill in all the broken places of his heart, who would get to walk down the isle with him and finally have my story book ending. My biggest mistake happened at the very beginning  even before we went out together on a spur-of-the-moment outing. It’s something that I think we could all look back and say, “Oh, I wish I’d done that too” because we’ve all dealt with heartache at least once in our lives and it’s this:

Set Apart SPOTLIGHT ft. Courtney Stewart

I'm a huge advocate of real talk, so let me be real with you all for a minute: I hate cliche's. 

I've. Heard. It. All.

"Guys are intimidated by your independence!"

"They must be intimidated by your height." (I'm just under 6 feet tall)

"Guys are intimidated by women in ministry."

"As soon as you stop looking, you'll find him!"

"You need to be more extroverted to snag a man...put yourself out there!"

"It's all in God's timing, don't try and go outside of His plan. Be patient!"

"You're way too mature for the guys around here."

"I just don't understand while you're single...you're so GREAT!"

"Maybe if you prayed more...you know?"

And so on. And so forth.

I'm sure you ladies can relate to me when I say that these conversations are neither soul-filling or encouraging.