What If He Didn’t Break Your Heart?

Sticks and stones may break our bones, but the lack of words may hurt too.

We, as women, often break our own hearts, not because we are demeaning of ourselves, but because we allow ourselves to become enveloped in false hopes, that we technically create all our own.  

Over time I’ve learned one simple rule, when it comes to dating with purpose. And, that is not to assume that a man wants something with you, if he hasn’t made that clear. The truth is that men, more often than not, say what they mean. If you listen to the things that a man tells you, typically his heart, and by heart I mean true intentions, not necessarily his feelings, will spill out of his mouth.

“A good man out of the good treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart bringeth forth that which is evil: for of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh.” Luke 6:45

Get Involved

So I started the year 2016 with these two phrases upper most in my heart – GET INVOLVED. I purposed in my heart that I was going to stretch myself more in advancing the kingdom of God and seeing the will of God being done in my home, workplace, community and my nation at large.

How does this tie in with our period of singleness? It is very obvious. Taking a look at 1st Corinthians 7 where Apostle Paul was giving an exhortation on marriage and singleness, we can see that this is a period where as singles we should be concerned about doing all that we can to advance the agenda of God here on the earth.

In my own life, I am becoming more and more fulfilled as I realize that every single day that I spend here on the earth is contributing towards something eternal and glorious. While I do not have everything all figured out, it is calming and peaceful to know that God Himself is in charge and in control.

Set Apart SPOTLIGHT: Kirsten Neumann

I was reading a book a couple of weeks ago, and in it a character quoted Song of Solomon 8:6 “Place me like a seal on your arm and like a seal upon your heart.” This led me to listen to the song You Won’t Relent by Misty Edwards. 

For the last few years-since grade eight, really, God has been working in me and teaching me about love. It actually all started out because a guy I really, really liked kind of led me on and then told me he didn’t reciprocate the feelings after a few months.

So, God started showing me what love is. And not just Love, but how He saw me. He started giving me verses like Psalm 103: 17 “But from everlasting to everlasting the Lord’s love is with those who fear him, and his righteousness with their children’s children.” Or leading me to books that really helped me see he loves me just the way I am.  

As an unmarried young lady, I’d like to get married someday. I have the whole white picket fence, two and a half kids and perfect husband who is completely romantic while working a good steady job and will never let me down. Unfortunately, even I know that it’s an unrealistic dream.

Nourish Your Spirit

It was Mother’s Day and I was at the spa. While sitting in the lounge room overlooking the ocean I was overcome with sadness. I had completely changed my life. I gave up the lifestyle that had destroyed so many parts of me.  I went back to church and done everything that I could possibly think of to make things right. Yet sadness still managed to permeate through all of that.

And as I sat in solitude it hit me. I had been putting my energy into all the wrong things.  All of my mental energy was used up focusing on how to rebuild my life and none was spent rebuilding my spirit.

See, your life and your spirit are two very different things and if you don’t realize it you can waste a whole lot of time trying to have a fruitful life whist allowing your spirit to perish. And that is what I had done. I was so focused on creating a good life, a life that was socially acceptable and pleasing to those I loved and I had completely neglected to nourish my spirit.

To an outsider it appeared that my life was progressing but if I allowed you to get close enough you would find that my spirit told a completely different story.

How do I Know When I'm Ready to Consider a Relationship?

"How will I know when I'm ready to consider a relationship?" As someone who is in a relationship, I get this question asked of me constantly. And honestly, it becomes harder and harder to answer the more I learn about Gods view of relationships. You see, God highly values relationships because He highly values marriage. The relationship between a man and a woman in marriage is probably Gods favorite relationship to participate in. Why else would He include it in the second chapter of the bible? 

Unfortunately, the bible says very little about dating relationships between men and women and, what’s even more conflicting, is that there is little advice for when to pursue a relationship. The most He gives us is this verse: 

Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

Genesis 2:24 ESV

However, we can find more indications of what God expects of us before pursuing relationships than we may at first think.