7 Reasons You Should Love Yourself





Photo Credit: Arielle Estoria Chroniclesofalioness.com

I went through most of my life wishing I could be someone else. Someone who was popular, went out with friends, had a boyfriend or two, and knew all the right things to say. Instead, I stayed home most of the time, reading books, watching TV, and waiting for the day when something in my life would change.

That day happened when I was in my early twenties and I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior.

There are many things that Jesus says in the Bible that to most would be considered scandalous. But one of the things He commanded is something that even to the daughters of God can be hard to accept.

“Teacher, which is the great commandment in the law?”
Jesus said to him, “You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ On these two commandments hand all the Law and the Prophets.”  (Matthew 22:36-40)

The love that Jesus is talking about is not proud of self-seeking. Just as we one day hope to speak the blessing of 1 Corinthians 13 in promise to our future spouse, we serve our neighbors (including our friends, co-workers, classmates, church and biological family) by being patient, kind, and taking no account of their wrongs. Yet, why can’t we do the same for ourselves? We’re usually so much harder on ourselves, only able to see the worst rather than seeing the best.

Here are 7 reasons why you should love yourself:

1    God says you should. Notice how Jesus’s response was not a suggestion. It was a plainly stated fact.

      The world does all that it can to tear us down but you were created in God’s image (Genesis 1:26). That alone makes you special!

      You are uniquely you.  There is no one else on earth that has ever been or will ever be you.  Isn’t that an amazing thought?! The God, who created every flower in the field and every star in the sky, envisioned you and created you to be exactly who you are. He spent 9 months forming you in your mother’s womb taking pain-staking care so that you could delight in His love here on earth and forever in eternity (Psalm 139: 13-16).

     You were created with a special purpose only you can fulfill.  Like Esther, you were made for such a time as this. There is something God placed in you that only you can do. God doesn’t create fluff or filler. He creates wonders too great to behold! Be assured in His Word that He knows the plans He has for you (Jeremiah 29:11) and will fulfill them (Psalm 57:2, NLT)

     You won’t pressure someone else to fill in the holes in your heart.  The God-sized hole you once had became filled once you accepted Christ but often, when the smaller holes of low self-esteem go unchecked, we look to a boyfriend to fill them. We put extremely high and unrealistic expectations on a man rather than realizing they’re sinners saved by grace just as we are. Once you can accept, like, and love yourself in a godly way, you can take the pressure off the man who may one day come into your life and be exactly who God created you to be – His workmanship created for good works (Ephesians 2:10).

You can take the focus off yourself and onto other things/people. Everyone has their issues (it comes with being fallen creatures) but loving yourself means that you can set aside those weakness and care for those who are hurting and in need. When we get so caught up in our own failings, we become limited and even fruitless. That’s not the kind of life Jesus came to bring us. In Christ, we can show His love to others as He so wonderfully showed it to us (Matthew 25:34-36).

You set up healthy boundaries that potential boyfriends won’t cross. This is something I realized until after the fact and I’d love nothing more than to spare you the pain of putting up boundaries only to erase them because a wolf in sheep’s clothing wants to see how far you’ll let him cross the line. When you know your value (and I mean truly know it), you will not allow someone to take advantage of you. They will respect you are a daughter of God and treat you like such (1 Timothy 5:1-3).

You won’t compare yourself to the standards of this world.  Have you ever wondered why God hasn’t brought you a boyfriend or even a husband in Christ? You wonder if you’re not pretty enough or good enough to have one but in reality, all you’re doing is comparing yourself to those you see on Facebook or Instagram. We weren’t made to compare ourselves but be in community with one another. The world may tell us that if we lack in a certain area it means we’re less than but God tells us that we are totally and wholly complete in Him (Colossians 2:10).

Before you consider being in a relationship, test your heart to see if you’re doing it so that someone can give you the love you hunger for or if you can truly love and serve that other person.

One of the hardest aspects of our walk with God is believing that He loves us as we are. Yes, we are being conformed to the image of His Son, Jesus, daily but that does not mean that He does not delight in who you are.

The world may try to tell us who we are not and try to make us conform to that unreachable image but God tells us who we are, and more importantly, who we belong to!

Liv, Contributor. She is 34 years old and lives in New York City. She has lived in NYC for most of her life except for a four-year period when I went to high school in Connecticut. She is a single daughter serving - encouraging women of all ages in their singleness and identities in Christ.
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