So after I had spent weeks with one thought in the back of my
mind—“why are there no ministries for single Christian women?”—I discovered She
is Set Apart via Instagram. And I did nothing.
Oh, I sure said I would. I told all of my close girlfriends all about
it. “They need people to contribute! Let’s share our testimonies!” And I’d pull
open Word and start typing…and then realize that it was absolutely necessary to
go buy avocados or run the laundry that very second.
I think my biggest hang-up was wondering how I would convince
you, dear reader, how valued and loved you are by your Father. How cherished
you are by your Savior. How to not make the same mistakes I did.
What arrogance! As though my testimony is so incredibly life
changing and crucial for you to read that the weight of the world—or at least
all single Christian young women—rests on my shoulders! And as though it is not
the Holy Spirit’s job to make real the Truth from His word.
So, here we are. I have something to tell you, something that
could take minutes or hours…or 500-1000 words. How on earth do I put nine years
of “failed” relationships, infatuations, lines crossed, lessons learned, and
moments of intense heartbreak in anything less than a multi-hour Starbucks gush
session?
Then I think about what would happen at said gush session. I
would spill my guts, share all the gory details, and you would sit back
silently with an invisible checklist: “well, I didn’t make that mistake…oh, but
I made that one…didn’t struggle with that…” and walk away, hopefully inspired,
but probably more weighed down, distracted and defeated, since mine is not the
typical “success” story. It doesn’t end in a white knight, a fairytale wedding,
and a happily ever after.
Don’t get me wrong—I see the value of testimonies, but I feel
led to do something different today. Instead of going into detail, here’s the
Spark Notes version of what I call a successful dating history:
Girl grows up idolizing marriage.
Girl puts relationships with boys before relationship with
God.
Girl realizes her priorities are wrong.
Girl goes a little crazy-feminist.
Girl realizes her priorities are still wrong.
Girl moves on, striving to put her Savior before anything else.
She isn’t perfect, and she still makes mistakes. But for the first time in her
life, she is truly, perfectly, absolutely content.
There you go. Fill in your own details and be encouraged that
there are women out there—in both single bliss and marital bliss—who are happy
despite their circumstances because Christ is first in their life. Because,
honestly, the details of your today don’t matter when the details of your
future were guaranteed the moment you believed in Him.
The success of my story above is that nothing needs to ever be
added. I may get married, have kids, and live what most Christian women deem
(and what I admit is) a “normal” life. I may live a life of celibate service,
free to go where God needs me to serve and glorify Him. Maybe my future holds
some hybrid of the two. Regardless, the rest of my life need only to be defined
as an imperfect, messy, completely content life devoted to serving my
Savior.
How wonderful is His Grace that endures through our ups and
downs, His Love which knows all and is therefore never disappointed in us, and
His Truth which is infallible and guaranteed throughout the ages.
I’d like to leave you with the words of an amazing woman who sat
behind me in Bible class for years. June’s life was beautiful and rich—she went
backpacking solo through Europe, had an amazing record collection, and just so
happened to enjoy her life of glorifying Christ without a husband. She passed
away in 2001 from complications of cancer. She always spoke truth and brought
everything back to God’s perfect plan, and her motto, which my mom reminds me
of often, was “The Lord first—always.” What beautiful words with the power to
truly transform our lives. And honestly, don’t they sum up our mission just
perfectly?
“Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our
faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame,
and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.” Hebrews 12:2
Emily Posch is a convicted serial crafter, and has a room
devoted to calligraphy, sewing, scrapbooking and every other creative outlet
she can get her hands on. She’s smarter than a 4th grader (barely)
and teaches part time at a classical school in Houston, Texas, and is knee-deep
in an online Masters of Education program through Texas A&M (whoop!).
Having served as a Sunday school teacher for the last eight years, Emily loves
encouraging the next generation to “grow in the grace and knowledge” of their
personal Savior. Instagram
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